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Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Last Updated: 24.06.2025 04:48

Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Food and fitness make or break success on weight loss meds, report finds - ABC News

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

A Cosmic Tech Mystery Results in Literal Lost Souls in This Sci-Fi Short Story - Gizmodo

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have a reading level above third grade

'I did a bit of a dance': Detectorist finds gold 'mourning ring' engraved with skull and date in UK field - Live Science

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

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I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

What caused the stock market to crash?

I understand how hurricane paths work

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When British people write X after everything, are they being serious or trying not to be awkward?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

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I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Are there any real-life examples of prisoners who escaped from hospitals and were never caught?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

That whole wheat bread you've been eating is often a trap - it's not what you think it is - Earth.com

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I actually pay taxes

I have received a fake legal notice, with unreachable phone number and unidentified address and fake lawyer enrollment number. The notice has caused my family severe stress. I know the person who might have done this illegal act. What should I do?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

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Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I can count

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t cotton to rapists

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for traitorism

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t buy bullshit

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I see through liars

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I can read

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP